Just For Today~

God's Work~

Just For Today
"When we stop living in the here and now, our problems become magnified unreasonably."

Basic Text, p.96

"Just for today" - it's a comforting thought. If we try to live in the past, we may find ourselves torn by painful, disquieting memories. The lessons of our using are not the teachers we seek for recovery. Living in tomorrow means moving in with fear.

We cannot see the shape of the secret future, and uncertainty brings worry. Our lives look overwhelming when we lose the focus of today.

Living in the moment offers freedom. In this moment, we know that we are safe. We are not using, and we have everything we need. What's more, life is happening in the here and now. The past is gone and the future has yet to arrive; our worrying won't change any of it. Today, we can enjoy our recovery, this very minute.

Just for today: I will stay in the here and now. Today - this moment - I am free.




You can easily judge a character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him~

My Grandma, Lillie Viola~

My Grandma is in the late stages of Alzheimer's.  She does not recognize me anymore, nor does she communicate with you anymore.  Sometimes you see a light in her eyes, and every once in awhile she steals a "kiss" from you.  Its a cruel disease.  Its a sad disease.  Sitting in front of you is the same "shell" that you have always loved and known, but that shell is all you have left.  You don't have the same "person" anymore.   What breaks my heart the most is that I remember my Grandma saying that out of anything there is to have, Alzheimer's is the one thing she would not want to have...and that one thing is what has robbed her of her life.
Growing up we always went to Grandma's house for lunch on Sunday's.  She had the best gravy, and she made these awesome crispy sugar cookies.  She also made the best chocolate cake with frosting.  My grandma had a dry sense of humor.  She was such a silly lady.  She would dress up in silly costumes and go in parades, she would sing, she would dance.  She laughed a lot.  She kept us kids every summer for Bible School.  I remember only getting to take a bath 1x a week while there, and even then she would only give you an itty bitty bit of luke warm water to bathe in.  :O)  I remember when she took me school clothes shopping once, and I got my first pair of velcro shoes.  I thought they were sooooo cool!!! 
My children will not have the same memories of my grandma as I do, but I still bring them along because I want them to know this piece of history.  This woman that I love so dearly.  I think it is unfair that she has to be plagued for so long with such a cruel disease, but this is not my decision.  Its all in the Lord's Hands, and He knows the plans He has made for Her, and who am I to say He isn't right..
I wanted to take a picture today of her, but she didn't want to wake up, and the pics I tried to take while she was sleeping didn't look "right"...so here are a few other ones.

So young, and beautiful

Her "earlier" years in the assisted living facility

Look at her pretty hair!

So this is my Grandma.  The light doesn't shine so bright in her eyes anymore, but as long as "she" is here, I will be there too.  Even if all I get to do is hum in her ear, rub her back, kiss her cheek.
That's enough for me.

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

So Emily is still really pretty sick.  Her fever is down, thank goodness.  After seeing a couple of different Doctors' they decided that she has a viral infection in her corneas....
We looked in her throat last night because she made mention that it hurts, and it is full of pus.
So I bring her in again today to see if she has strep.  Didn't she have her tonsils removed so she wouldn't get strep anymore?  Yep!  She did.  It didn't work.  I think its because they shaved her tonsils, did not totally remove them.
So the saga continues....
Hope you feel better soon my sweet Emily.....

***REVISED***  Got back from the Dr and she doesn't have strep, she has mono!  So now I know what's wrong at least.  Here's hoping for a fast recovery....

In honor of the lives lost on 9/11/01

I remember Troy and I were sitting in the basement watching tv when we heard that we had been attacked by terrorists.  Its one of those moments you will remember forever.  I didn't lose any loved ones in those attacks, nor do I know of anyone who did.  But I do know what its like to lose someone you love dearly.  Today I pray for the families of the victims.  I pray for the people who were directly and indirectly affected by the attacks on the US that day.  I hope and pray that the families have found peace, I pray that they have found salvation through Christ. 
May our Country, in the sad state it is in, use this day as a day of not only remembrance, but a day to reflect on how "dirty" our Country has become.  We cannot expect God to bless us if we do not obey His commands, and we should not be surprised by the state we are currently in.
Today, I also pray for our Country.  That we, as a whole, may find God again.

In GOD we ALL need to TRUST

Thank you for your sacrifice and service

My poor Beebz....

My poor Emily has had such a rough past 4 weeks or so...
Out of 8 days of school she has already missed 3.
She came home on Wednesday with what appeared to be pink eye.
I started her on drops, and by Friday there was no improvement, and by 3 she had started feeling really sick, with fever, chills, bodyaches, headaches, etc...
I took her to urgent care and by the time we got in her fever was almost 105.
They did a full panel blood test, checked her urine, and everything came back OK.  (thank goodness)
So.....they gave me stronger drops, and sent us home.
She is so sick.  She asked me if she was going to die while we were at the DR.  :O(
After she went to bed the poor thing must have started with a dream, and she was literally hallucinating.
She jumped off her bed and ran down the hallway.  I called her name, and she came back in and jumped back on to her bed crying saying "they are all over my body!!  They are hurting me!!  Get them off of me.  I don't want to die mommy.  Don't let me die, mommy, promise to God I'm not going to die"... she had gouged the corner of her eye with her fingernail while trying to get "them" off of her...
It was so sad....
She finally "came to" and we slept together for most of the night, though fitfully.
Just took her temp again, and its 103.6 so I gave her some ibuprofen. 
Pray for Emily, and that her body will fight whatever is going on inside of it please.

I love you Beebz.
Mamma

Happy Birthday to the most wonderful woman I know!!

this does NOT look like a 61 year old!!

Yesterday, September 9th, my mom turned 61.
We went out to lunch at Red Lobster, and went out shopping for candles at Yankee Candle and she chose a wind chime to hang at her new house.  It was a nice day. 
My mom jokes sometimes that I need to "cut the chord" with her, but I'll tell you what....being as close as I am to my mom is a blessing from God, and I have no intention of cutting it.  Ever.

I could literally write pages and pages about my mom, but obviously I am not going to do that.  I am just going to say that if us women in the world could be more like her, we would have happier husbands, happier children, and be happier in general.  She is selfless, gentle, smart.  She knows when to hold her tongue, and when to say something.  When she has to say something that would sting, she chooses her words carefully, and you know she does it out of love.

My mom is one of the strongest women I know.  She has faced many, many heartbreaks.  She lost both her parents at a very young age, and when I try to imagine what it would be like raising my children without my mom in my life??  Well...I can't.  It has to be something that is difficult to do.  She lost her son.  I imagine Mary when she watched her son die on that cross.  The pure heart wrenching pain she felt.  My mom chose to continue to live after Danny died.  A part of her died with him, but she lives on for my Dad.  For Lisa.  For Me.  For her grandchildren.

Thank you for the lessons you CONTINUE to teach me.  Thank you for being my biggest fan.  Thank you for believing in me when others didn't.  Thank you for never giving up on me.

I love you.
Kristy

Say hello to my little friends~

My family may think I'm a little crazy, but over the summer I have had the pleasure of observing the cuteness of Tree Frogs.  Every night anywhere from 10 to 20 Tree Frogs plant themselves on my kitchen window for the evening.  I turn the light on, and it becomes a feeding frenzy for them, as the moths and little insects are attracted to the light.  These frogs are sooo cool!!  I have developed a real fondness for them, and I hope they come back next year.  They are fun to watch.  Lately they have been eating these huge moths, (in comparison to their body size they are huge anyway).  The first time I saw it I thought maybe a moth was trying to "attack" the frog so I ran out with a little stick and separated the two.  But I have seen this almost every night since, and it is just a slow process for these little frogs to munch down on such a large dinner!!  It seems like such a simple thing, and maybe it is.  But it is a simple gift from God.  One that I have thoroughly enjoyed over the summer, and I will miss as the weather turns cold and they go to their little hideaways until spring breaks again.  I have been trying and trying to get cool pictures of these guys, but the best I can get is what I have here.
Others may or may not appreciate my little frogs, but someday my children will read this, and they are going to laugh and say "I remember when mom was soooo obsessed with those frogs!!!"
Which makes it worth it.
:O)

I surely will miss these adorable little guys when winter comes!!  Stay safe my friends....(I told you I was a little crazy....) 

Jon is off to his first day of school as a sophmore!!

Wow!  I have a sophomore in college, AND  sophomore in high school....  This is starting to play with my "I'm getting old" in my head...Jon has decided that for his junior and senior year he would like to go to the community college and take advantage of getting 2 years of schooling paid for...what a smart boy.  :O)  Of course he may change his mind 5 times before that time arrives, but for now that is what he is thinking he wants to do.  So he just left for the bus stop, and was feeling nervous...Uhh....how I remember that dreaded feeling of butterflies that first day!! 
So congrats on making it to your sophomore year, Jon.  I love you, and I am very proud of the young man you are becoming.  I hope that you hear the voice of Mr. Milbauer as you make choices in life, and remember that you have leadership qualities.  Not everyone has them.  Don't throw it out the window!!
Remember, no matter what I always love you.  I am proud to call you either "Jonathan Robert Cameron, MD", and I will be proud to call you "Jonny Bob-used car salesman"...  ;O)  The only thing I won't accept is you being 40 and living in my basement with a video game addiction!!  hee hee

My handsome young man

I miss him....

Today I am missing Danny...
it has been awhile.  Not that I don't think about him everyday...but I haven't missed him where I am reduced to tears in a while.  I am learning that its OK to allow myself this time when I feel this way.  Its OK for me to hurt.  Its OK for me to cry.  Its OK to miss my little brother.  There is so much I could just sit and write about....like how I accidentally spit directly into his mouth once when we were younger...LOL or how he could make me laugh so hard I thought I might pee my pants...and the phone calls we shared.  The songs.  The music.  So many things.  Sometimes I get scared that I'm not going to bring his face into my memory anymore.  I hope that never happens.  I want to always be able to bring him to me when I need to reflect.  I miss that he is missing out on so much.  But I guess that's all I will say for now.

Proud Sister with her baby brother who had hair like "butter"

I love you Danny.  I miss you so much still.  Makes me wonder if that will ever go away.  What a stupid thing to question...

Email from Emily's 5th grade teacher~

I got this email from Emily's teacher last night...
I love having this blog so I can save all these little treasures for the kids to enjoy someday when they are older.
They don't know it yet, but someday they will be very, very happy that their mamma took the time to book mark our lives....
:O)



I  just wanted to drop you a note and let you know how Emily has been doing.  Emily is a great girl to have in class!  She is so confident and helpful.  Her positive outlook, smile, and work ethic set a positive example for the rest of the students.  I'm looking forward to an enjoyable and successful year with Emily!

Thanks!

Amy Lambert